Do you ever find yourself amused (and amazed) by peoples' white trash antics?
Sure you do.
Southern Fried White Trash takes a humorous look at the unbelievable mindset of the national subculture (and Southern specialty) we affectionately refer to as "white trash."

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

I hereby solemnly resolve…

Ahhh New Year's resolutions. So pat. So cliché. So difficult to uphold. Every year, as the minute hand of the clock slowly ticks just past 11:59 pm on December 31, millions of people set themselves up for certain failure. "I will lose the extra weight." "I will stop smoking." "I will read more and watch Jerry Springer less." And so on. And every year, about 4 – 6 weeks into the pledge, we fall off the promise wagon. Experts tell us that we fail as we do because of the unrealistic nature of our endeavors. We need to set smaller, more attainable goals. We need to put the prize within reach.

I have given my resolution(s) a lot of thought this year. Of course, I need to work on my fitness. That's a given and never changes. If you don't use it, you lose it. I can't even call that one a New Year resolution. It's a fact of life.

OK so next – "I will get this book published this year." That one's realistic, necessary and do-able. That's a keeper.

"I will be nicer, less judgmental." I have batted this one around a bit, thought about it from several angles. It's not that I'm not nice. I just have no patience or tolerance for mindless nonsense. If you act stupid, I'm going to call you on it, and I would hope you'd do the same for me. I'm not so sure I'm judgmental, either. I simply pay attention to what 50 years of experience have taught me. So, I'm going to scratch that one.

"I will be a better Mom, a better wife." That's another given, I always want to be better in both areas. Keep.

I solicited New Year resolution responses from some of my blog followers/subscribers. Here are some of the plums:

"I will allow my mother-in-law to visit at least one time this year." Yikes. I know who that one DIDN'T come from!

""I will stop gambling." Power to you, bud.

"I will drink less." OK here's my opinion on that. If drinking has become such an issue in your life that you're making resolutions about it, it's time to quit altogether, not just cut back. Wise up, dude.

"I will end my affair and devote myself to my wife and family." Wow. Do you know that I have your IP address?

"I will take up belly-dancing." J

Everyone should have at least one resolution, so come on. What's yours? I won't tell. I won't be mean, and I won't be judgmental. Promise. J


  1. I resolve to read your BOOK - IF you ever get it out there!!

  2. My resolution this year is to be a proffesional ASSHOLE. Wait I allready have that one mastered. Lets see how about the belly dancing thing. That would be pretty. I know i will get control of my finances better and quit being a prisoner to my debt. I think my darling bride would agree.


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